Coaching Conversations in 2025

Self-Awareness Wins

Tim Hagen

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Self-Awareness As Career Accelerator

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One of the greatest gifts we can give ourselves, and it's not a gift most people pursue, but it is a differentiating factor in how you work with people, how people perceive you. And dare I say, it is probably the best career accelerator somebody can adopt. And that's self-awareness. I've said it time and time again: 85% of people significantly lack self-awareness, according to a New York Times bestseller by Dr. Tasha Yurik, a PhD industrial psychologist. Number one, ask for feedback. Number two, take time. Don't even take time, schedule time to reflect. Think about conversations that went well. Think about things that didn't go so well, and coach yourself and ask, what could I have done better? What perception did I create? What's the benefit if I alter that? Number three, track your emotional triggers. You know, I often think about triggers as something that we probably need to double down on. Have you ever had that person in your life and they walk in the room and you just don't care for

Build The Habit Of Reflection

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that person and you have an emotional feeling, like, oh, Tim's here again. Oh, that's a trigger. That's an emotional trigger. If you ever had that person who talks over other people and they talk over you in a meeting, and how many people will label that person? That person just loves to hear themselves talk. You later find out that that person has ADD

Track Emotional Triggers Without Judging

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and is really a good person and doesn't realize they're doing it. The reason we do these things is so we don't make assumptions, so we don't judge, so we don't label other people, because that's so easy to do. And conduct a daily review. What did I do well? What challenged me today? What will I do differently tomorrow that will raise my game? And last, discover your impact in other people. You know, I say it all the time, and it doesn't mean I'm always right, but I literally say what we say matters. And a lot of times our intentions create perceptions we were not hoping for. It's tough, right? It creates a lot of challenges for us. But when we ask for feedback and we just say thank you, come on, everybody, what do we do? We always say, Well, can you give me an example? And then we address the example, further distancing ourselves from the feedback that was provided. You know, I often say to people, you know, the goal of feedback is never to give feedback. The goal of feedback is to give it so someone receives it well and strategically utilizes it. Yet we have to be great recipients of that. We have to make it easy for other

Receive Feedback Without Defensiveness

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people to give us feedback. We actually have to realize one thing: we're all magnets. We either draw people in or we repel or push people away. Discover your self-awareness, schedule time to build self-awareness. You know, one of the toughest things to do is look in the mirror. And I've said this for 34 years. The definition of coaching is very simple. Number one, it's looking in the mirror and being honest. Number two, it's taking action on number one. Yet very few people do number one arbitrarily well. Here's the benefit to all of us. For those who do this, you will immediately vault yourself into the

Your Impact Draws People In

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top 20% of the workforce. Gallup reports only 19 to 21% of people are actively engaged. The rest are neutral or actively disengaged. You have a tremendous opportunity to differentiate yourself instantly by getting feedback and not

Mirror Test, Coaching, And Engagement Gap

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showing judgment, not showing resistance. Now remember, I never said you got to agree with all the feedback. Yet, by listening and absorbing and showing appreciation, what you've actually done is differentiated yourself. Good luck.